Meleks Story

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What I remember about my personality before I had brain tumour was the fact that I was bubbly, loved dressing up would not have a hair out of place. You would never catch me without make-up; I loved sports and had taken up tennis. I loved studying English, Math’s and Accounts. This was my life up until 1993. I was determined to take A-level English and qualify as a chartered accountant with a dream of having my own practice one day.

A girl can dream …?

Summer 1993 we drove to Cyprus with our two children, for a six week holiday. We were staying the last week of our holiday at my mum’s.
A week before we were due to drive back to England, four am in the morning I found myself waking up to a night-mare watching my left leg swinging in circles and roaring with my mouth closed. I don’t know how that’s possible, this was a seizure, I was in total disbelief. After a visit to the hospital in Lefkosa I was brought home to rest.

When I woke up the next morning I woke up with a different personality, I found my mum and Mustafa staring at me, constantly telling me to leave what I was trying to do, yes! Trying, I found myself not being able to do the simplest things like hold a cup of tea, drink it without slurping like an old woman.

In England my GP was not very helpful and put me on depression pills. As time passed I got worse people could not understand why I was like a zombie, to be honest nor did I.

In September 1993 my first operation took place at The National Hospital. When I came out of what was a 6 hour operation, it must have been the longest wait for Mustafa. All of my right side was paralyzed, I was kept in hospital and my wound would not heal well. It produced liquid under the skin, so one of my Registrar Mr. Davies called it bogginess.

I stayed in hospital till my wound healed and till I got my right leg and arm movement back at least. Unfortunately on the week that I was due to leave hospital when my mother came to visit me, as I tried to relax I felt some force at the tip of my toes in my right leg.

This force started bending my foot from side to side moving upwards in-side my leg, at the time it felt like it was breaking my bones as it slowly moved upwards to my thigh.

I have never felt so scared not knowing what this alien thing was and what it was doing to me. I was thinking ‘what has gone wrong, am I going to die, please somebody stop this pain it is unbearable’ When the nurses finally came they injected my thigh and finally it stopped within seconds. When I asked them what had happened to me I was told that I had, apparently experienced my first grand mall Epilepsy.

They were very sorry that I happened to be conscious through it.
I finally left the hospital came home, but terrified of the fact that I was away from my nurses.

After six months, my scalp got infected, I started to have seizures non-stop. I needed another operation to cut the scalp out.

After four operations, two years and a titanium plate to replace the infected scalp I began to mend.
I had to learn to live with the idea of being disabled. It nearly killed me!

My pride got the better of me; I could not face the world anymore.
Slowly, very slowly I started to make progress but progress stopped at slurred speech, and a limping right leg.

When I met the PCRF group, they were doing charity walks in the untouched mountains of Northern Cyprus surrounded by wild orchids. I was not sure when I decided to join the walk if I would be able to do it but I made a conscious decision to try.

I joined them on their second charity walk in 2005, I don’t know why I was so scared, the beautiful scenery, clear blue sea, the journey felt so surreal. There I met people with similar backgrounds, disabilities, who had problems with walking because of their operation. Supporting each other hand in hand, we survived the wonderful walk. It was exhilarating!

For my condition I need a lot of emotional and mental guidance, they offer this. For years not being able to accept that it is ok to be different, has had a drastic effect on my day-to-day life. Today I am having counseling from the charity to find my way back to the real world, which hospitals fail to offer you.

Because of the help I am getting from a member of PCRF, I find myself able to look after myself with dignity, look after my home most days and sometimes I look after my grandchild.

I have started to accept being a little slower and different to what I used to be. That being slow does not stop me being myself. I have also written a book called Cypriot Barbecue Delights and Side Dishes and I am so proud to have done this.

I hope that somebody going through a difficult time will read this and get the strength to carry on.

I have survived and I am picking up the pieces of my life.


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